As I sit here re-doing a raw chicken that my mom told me didn't have enough texture (and deep down inside, I knew she was right, even though I sat silently seething), I started thinking about other occasions when things didn't go quite as planned. Here are a few off the top of my head:
1- The first time I made crabs, I put their eyes ON TOP of their shells, so they were looking at the ceiling, as opposed to their proper placement, which is in the front. Someone, somewhere, owns these crabs!!!! PLEASE, if you are out there and you read this, I will make you new ones! Those were deformed!
2- My first attempt at rice involved rolling each grain individually...and winding up with a heap of fat, white maggots.
3- BURNING things! Someone, usually my younger sister, has, on occasion, cranked up the heat on MY oven, resulting in a bunch of shiny, melted looking creations. I would always smell it first, then run over in a blind panic. I'd be so livid that I'd scream and throw them at the wall :-/. It is even more tantrum inducing if I had spent over an hour or more making them. She no longer has access to my oven :-D.
4- The time my oven went on the fritz a few years ago. It was running out of "juice", so everything I made was undercooked. Yup, they fell apart. Luckily, that happened before anything was sent in the mail to paying customers :-O. I had to make everything all over again.
5- When I try to fit something bigger (or longer) into something smaller. For example, an octopus or squid into a small glass jar. Legs have broken. My reaction? I go to the balcony outside and hurl it into the bushes below. I can't bear to look at it anymore....or have it anywhere in the house!
6. This one isn't that major, but it is annoying: trying to get the perfect color. You keep adding on to the lump of clay in your hand, thinking: ok, just a bit more of this color and it'll be PERFECT....until it turns into a giant wad of the ugliest, most bizarre color you've ever seen in your life, far from what you had in mind when you started :-/. Some of my clay mountain was built on these abominations. Nay, they are the foundation.
7- My first pig's head. Enough said.
- So what are your disasters or near disasters? I would love to hear some!!